The Me I Am Becoming

There is so much commercialism available to girls of all ages. What the TV and maggies don't drill into their heads, friends and family certainly will. Am I excluded, of course not, not one of us is untouched by this form of socialism literally thrown on us before we can define ourselves.

In 2008 I decided to do something for me, just to see what it would be like. I thought to myself, 'It's way past time for another relaxer. My hair is so thick you could lose a small child in it.' But I realized I missed my 6-8 week regimen of: pretreated/greasing my scalp, applying and combing (while crying) the relaxer, rinsing over and over, sitting under the dryer or blow drying (another long process) and then still not done because I have to curl and then roll up my hair. But wait, there's more...Don't let it rain. Oh crap! all that curling and now my hair has to go in a ponytail because of the humidity! So throw the hot curlers in my bag and curl it again when I get to work.

Enough of all that! I happen to be blessed with a length of hair that lays on my shoulders but I was so caught up in trying to make my look as sleek, shiny and bouncy as females who were wearing fake hair! No offense sistas It was so bad I couldn't tell if I was looking at real hair or not, even on the baby girls. Not only could I not tell but I once had a female curse me because she assumed my hair was fake.

So now my hair anniversary is coming. I was thinking, 2007 is probably my anniversary but since I can't remember the month of my last relaxer I'm fine using the month I decided to fore go the crack. That right Whitney! crack is whack, even in your hair. Oh in my hair. This posting is strictly about my hair and my journey, I would never be so lofty as to knock someone for their choices.

So, hmm, I do tend to ramble; anywho! THE ME I AM BECOMING, born out of mere freedom to choose, is finding herself and I think I like her. I love knowing that I am not defined by makeup, which I never wore anyway; nor my clothing, which have never been designer labels; nor my bank account, which is quite sparse. I am defined by who I want to be. I choose to never put that creamy crack in my again, I choose to never put heating elements in my hair again, I choose never to add manufactured hair to head again or anyone else's hair for that matter. I choose to not wear makeup, I choose gray naturally and hope it to be gracefully. I choose to continue to strive to a woman of character, grace and virtue. So as I travel my path to a positive napptitude, I am falling in love with YY THE ME I AM BECOMING. YY